Neena Gupta Said If You Need A Lot Of Space Then Don’t Get Into A Relationship. We Don’t Quite Agree
In my dating career of almost 15 years, I have had my share of relationships. What really confused me though is the amount of space each required kept changing. Initially, I dated people who didn’t need much space and preferred the closeness instead. We’d talk every day, know where the other person is, hang out with each other’s and know a lot about each other. When they’d be going through something, they wouldn’t want to be on their own for a prolonged period but rather pour their hearts out to me. Neena Gupta, who is happily married to Vivek Mehra doesn’t believe in too much space in relationships either.
In a recent interview with Cinema Journal, Neena Gupta questioned the concept of “space” in a relationship. She asked, “Giving space to your partner in a relationship is nonsense. If you need space then why are you living together?” I believe it really depends on whether the amount of space your partner needs and whether it conflicts with the amount of closeness you need. As long as two people are on the same page, I think it works. Say for instance, my ex didn’t think it was important to speak to me during the week. Going by the fact that I call him “ex” now, it’s evident it clashed with the closeness I need. But then again, if a guy wants to speak to me all day, every day, that clashes with the space I need. But he’d be good with a girl who wants the same.
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Having said that, Neena Gupta emphasised that being happy on your own is incredibly important. “You can’t rely on others for your happiness, you need to find it within yourself. We crib our partners don’t spend time with us; instead you should try and get busy. Cook, paint, write or do anything that you are good at and keep yourself occupied,” she advised.
Our relationships form our perception of love and romance. We begin to think this is how it is supposed to be but there’s no one-size-fits-all here. So when one thing works for a couple, it may not work for another. In fact, everyone has different problems, different dealbreakers. The friend who advised you to breakup because your partner has a certain flaw? It’s not like her partner is spick and span flawless. She probably deals with a different set of annoying traits. And your partners do the same.
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Neena Gupta explained that in relationships, there are no set rules or solutions. “I feel no one can give any advice to anyone. Everyone has different problems and they have to deal with them accordingly. There is no rule for handling any particular problem. Move on and get busy. Talking about your problem is important, parents and kids need to talk about problems, this develops understanding,” she said.