Transgender Awareness Week: Let’s Be Better Allys By Never Saying These Things To A Transgender Person!
Let's be good allies!
The world is full of 8 billion unique, different and fabulous people and this diversity is something that must be celebrated. It’s time we stop dividing the world and looking at it in black and white, right and wrong or male and female. More so because this world is much more colourful with people from the beautiful LGBTQIA+ community and one of these amazing sexualities is transgender. We all have heard the term ‘transgender’ but not all of us know how to define someone who identifies himself, herself or themselves as transgender. A transgender person is someone who self-identifies their gender and sexuality differently from what was assigned to them at birth. Some of them might even choose to express their gender with the way they dress or with gender-affirming surgeries. This week of November 13 to 19 is being celebrated as Transgender awareness week to spread knowledge and awareness among the masses.
Transgender Awareness Week can not only help give birth to a lot of allies but it can also help raise awareness about all the things that matter to transgender people. From how to interact with them to how to support and stand up for the LGBTQIA+ community, this week can teach you a lot. And the most important thing to remember for allies is to interact with the LGBTQIA+ community in the right manner. Unfortunately, unknowingly, a lot of us end up saying things that can be hurtful. Do you want to make sure that this doesn’t happen? Well, here’s a list of the things that you should never say to a trans person so that you don’t make the same mistake.
7 Things You Should Never Say To A Trans Person
1. So, Have You Had Surgery?
Buddy, this is literally none of your business. Having or not having surgery is a very personal choice. You wouldn’t want just anyone to ask you about your private parts so, what gives you the right to ask and intrude? This is a hard no.
2. You Look Like A Real Man/Woman!
Saying this isn’t the compliment you might think it is. By saying this, you’re essentially telling them that you don’t consider them a ‘real’ man or woman which is extremely hurtful. You must realise that their goal isn’t to simply look like a man or woman, it is their gender. They are real men or women.
3. So, How Do You Have Sex?
If you at some point think that this is an appropriate thing to ask then you need to immediately remove yourself from the situation and get your brain checked. This might seem like a clever way to ask them about their body parts but trust me it isn’t. On top of that, physical intimacy and sex are very personal affairs and therefore, you should stay out of them.
4. Then, You’re ‘Biologically’ Male/Female?
This is one most commonly asked questions. Most people make the mistake of asking a trans person about their biological gender. But understand that many transgenders come face-to-face with this question every single day. And this question proves how little importance you give to their self-assigned gender because, in the end, people end up deciding their gender based on their body parts. So, try to be the change and bite your tongue instead.
5. Oh! You’re A She-Male/ You’re An It!
One important note for all of you is to never call a trans person ‘she-male’ or ‘it’. These are very offensive, derogatory and insulting terms. A trans person isn’t an object and a trans woman shouldn’t be labelled as a ‘she-male’ because that isn’t her identity. You need to be careful with what you say.
6. But, What’s Your Real Name?
Come on, really? Their real name is the name that they introduced themselves with, how hard is it to digest that? Being transgender isn’t like playing a role. The name that transgender people identify themselves with reflects their true identity. So, asking them this will be a rude way of questioning their identity.
7. Oh! Is The Transition Complete?
Being transgender isn’t a process. You don’t become a transgender person only when you get gender-affirming surgeries. No transition needs to be completed. These surgeries are a mere choice and it’s essential to remember that.
Also Read: 6 Adorable Ways to Reinvent Traditions for A Beautiful LGBTQ+ Wedding
These are some of the things you shouldn’t ask or say to any trans person. It’s acceptable to be curious about people who are different from you but there is a limit on how much you should ask someone. Intruding in a person’s life is never acceptable. We should never invade anyone’s privacy or question their identity just because we don’t understand it completely. Always be mindful of what you say to avoid hurting someone unintentionally. A little thought from your end can go a long way. FYI, it’s not their job to educate you about transgenders or LGBTQIA+ community.
Image Source: Netflix
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