This Tweet About Anushka Sharma And Virat Kohli Is The Epitome Of Misogyny And Middle Aged Uncle Humour
In my 24 years of existence (Dammit! I have been around for too long), I have heard a lot of ridiculous opinions and theories. The flat earth theory, faked lunar landings, lizard people (yes, that’s a thing) and much more. But, nothing amuses me as much as the idea that women have the power to “influence” adult men. Think about it, the moment a man scr*ws up, the woman closest to him is attacked. In most cases, the man isn’t even villainised as much as the woman will be. And one of the most classic examples of this in recent times is when Anushka Sharma was blamed for Virat Kohli not doing well in his matches. Ugh, wild times.
While I was looking for my daily dose of gossip on the accursed app that is Twitter, I came across this Tweet:
https://twitter.com/AmbaniHu/status/1543684509891117056?s=20&t=cQ5nO7m7Zmxf3SiU8bRqNQ
Now if you ask me, this is the epitome of middle-aged uncle humour. You know those “haha I hate my wife” jokes? This sounds like an extension of that, only, that you are hating on someone else’s; when did misogyny ever go out of fashion anyway? Because God forbid you (or someone else) love the woman you married. Okay, I digress.
This Tweet is exactly what is wrong with the way we as a society perceive women. Somehow, we are never our own person but simply a reflection of the men in our lives. We are blamed for their successes and failures. And while the former might not sound like such a bad thing, let me tell you why it is. Women are inherently expected to support the men in their lives i.e. sons, husbands, boyfriends, fathers etc by sacrificing and adjusting. THAT is what enables men to be successful. A nurturing mother/wife/sister who sacrificed her own career/education/health to support theirs. And women will be blamed for the man’s errors too. Allegedly it is our fault that we didn’t want to sacrifice, adjust or in Anushka’s case, was a “distraction” for an otherwise good player.
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Because, out of the many, many things that might have caused Virat Kohli to be off his game, the most unlikely reason, Anushka distracting him has to be the most plausible one. Because apparently, single cricket players have never had a bad game.
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We have somehow built a society where not only men hold more power than women and women are left giving explanations for the actions of adult men. How it is any different from having a child, I have no clue. Look at this for example: how many times have we seen a man cheating and then people gossiping about the wife or the woman he cheated with? Moreover, how many times has it caused a rivalry between the women? And in all this, where is the man? Because from where I stand, an adult chose to be unfaithful to his partner, why is anybody except him being questioned, doubted and villainised?
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Also Read: Anushka Sharma Calls Out A Publication For Posting Images Of Daughter Vamika. Why Is It So Hard To Respect Privacy?
Another example: is those typical saas-bahu fights where the saas will accuse the bahu of “influencing” her son. “Tune hi mere bete ko fasaya. Nahi toh vo esa kar hi nahi sakta!” Kyu nahi kar sakta bhai? Did your son come with a sticker guaranteeing obedience and moral values for a lifetime? He is an adult and if something he did upset you, hold him accountable and talk to him like one. Stop coddling him. Just because you spent your life being answerable for the men in your life, don’t expect your daughter-in-law to be as well.
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And while this rant might seem like an overreaction to a Tweet, it isn’t. It is 24 years of frustration from my personal experiences as a woman in India and all the ones I have observed. Anushka is one of the countless women who are mocked and given a hard time for the mistakes made by the men in their lives. Are these people planning to blame Vamika too when Virat is off his game next time? And while partners should support each other through everything, that’s all there is to it, support. Ultimately, an adult has t be held responsible for their actions. So, when are the men in our society going to grow up?
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