Woman Is Baffled By Husband’s Amputees Fetish And His Desire Of Becoming One
They say you shouldn’t judge anyone on their fetishes. But it’s easier said than done. Being completely non-judgemental is a skill we cannot master. Honestly, I don’t even know if we must. A little judgement is good, in my opinion. Like it really depends what is that person’s fetish. If they are into children, they deserve to be in prison. Yuck! If they get off by harming others, prison too. If they are into things like golden shower and all, I just find that gross AF. Will I date that person even if they are amazing otherwise? Nope. But if someone else is okay with that, I won’t judge them. That’s the extent of not being judgemental I can pull off.
Recently a woman wrote to the Abigail Van Buren agony aunt column discussing her husband’s weird fetish. “My husband and I have been married for six mostly blissful years, but recently, some of his fantasies have started to worry me. About six months ago, he told me he had an attraction to women with amputations. Naturally, I was confused. I didn’t even know that was a “thing,” but I accepted it, even though I thought it was odd,” she wrote.
She further added how they did a role-play that involved her pretending to be an amputee. She wrote, “Three months ago, he asked to do some role playing, where we hid my leg under a towel to give the appearance of having a below-the-knee amputation, which he says is his favourite. I didn’t like it, but I went ahead with it. But now things are getting to be too much for me. He recently told me that not only does he find amputees attractive, but he wants to be one. What do I do?”
Van Buren’s daughter Jeanne Phillips, who now writes the column after her mother wrote, “The name for your husband’s fetish is body integrity identity disorder. It is important that you learn more about it, and I am recommending you do some research on the subject. You will find the information on the internet.” She also suggested that the woman should introspect and figure if she can live with it or she needs to end her marriage. “You should also consult a licensed psychotherapist to help you decide whether this fetish is something you are prepared to live with or it’s time to end your marriage,” Phillips wrote.
Fetish for amputees is known as acrotomophilia, while the sexual desire to become one is known as apotemnophilia. Is losing a limb a joke to her husband? How perverted you are that you are willing to make your entire life difficult just to get off on your fantasy?
“The term body integrity identity disorder (BIID) describes the extremely rare phenomenon of persons who desire the amputation of one or more healthy limbs or who desire a paralysis. Some of these persons mutilate themselves; others ask surgeons for an amputation or for the transection of their spinal cord. Psychologists and physicians explain this phenomenon in quite different ways; but a successful psychotherapeutic or pharmaceutical therapy is not known,” a science journal described the phenomenon.
“In 2000, the public found out that a Scottish surgeon named Robert Smith had performed leg amputations on two patients with seemingly normal limbs,” reports verywellmind.com. “Most surgeons who encounter BIID have an alarmed reaction to the prospect of using radical surgery to treat the illness. These surgeons claim that anybody who wants to amputate a “healthy” limb has mental illness and limited insight that compromises her ability to give informed consent,” it adds.
This is clearly not normal. It is a disease. But there is still a debate on whether or not amputating a healthy limb should be permitted. Is it really consent if the person is suffering from a mental illness? Maybe the woman can take her husband to therapy and get some herself to deal with the situation better. I am at a loss of words!