This Clip From Pernia Qureshi’s Wedding Talks About Respect In Interfaith Marriages And It Comes At The Right Time
Recently, the new Tanishq ad found itself in the middle of an inane controversy as some people got butthurt with the Hindu-Muslim angle in it. What is so wrong with interfaith marriages? So much for India calling itself secular. It’s baffling how people take such a beautiful sentiment so negatively. In the ad, a mother-in-law has planned a baby shower for her daughter-in-law who comes from a different faith. The mom-to-be is incredibly surprised and tells her that they don’t even have such a ritual in their faith. But the mom says making a daughter happy is common in every faith. It’s so beautiful and simple – you don’t have to follow but just respect each other’s faith. And considering how religious sentiments in India are often given more weightage than human sentiments, this ad is just the need of the hour.
And while a section of our society remains butt hurt, The Wedding Filmer shared a heart-warming video of Pernia Qureshi’s wedding with Sahil Gilani. It was a two-part wedding consisting both of a nikah and saath phere. The video begins with Sahil talking about how he is half Hindu and half Muslim and it’s just perfect. “I am 50 percent Hindu and 50 percent Muslim, which is why for me it was extremely important to have both a nikah and pheras together,” Sahil says in the video.
His parents had an interfaith marriage and in the video, they emphasised how you must just respect each other’s religion. Sahil’s mom reminisces her young days and shares how her mother-in-law back then told her she must be God-fearing and which God she fears doesn’t matter. Both faiths co-exist in the same household, standing tall on the foundation of mutual respect.
The Wedding Filmer shared the video with the caption: “More than anything, what this story reiterates is that love goes beyond religion! Respecting each other’s beliefs especially in times like these should really be that simple.”
The couple got married last year and The Wedding Filmer shared their wedding video in August 2020. However, considering the debate on interfaith marriages right now, The Wedding Filmer shared a clip of the video again, just to point out what unity in diversity truly means.
Pakistani photographer and model Waliya Najib commented,“Start of the video I thought it was so weird like how can you be half hindu and half muslim?! But by the end, It touched me. Goosebumps literally. ‘Just respecting each other’s religion is so simple!’”
“Absolutely wonderful. This shows the real Ekatvam,” another user commented. “There are some lovely HUMANS like these and then there are some PEOPLE messing because of a normal TV ad,” a user pointed out. It was just so beautiful to see no idiots in the comments spreading hate.
In the longer version of the video, Pernia says, “I think I want just a friend for life. Someone who legally has to be my friend forever. Doing all the wonderful things with that person and having them as a companion when you are older.” These things matter and not which God you pray to. This is what makes for a good marriage.
“Love without respect is dangerous; it can crush the other person, sometimes literally. To respect is to understand that the other person is not you, not an extension of you, not a reflection of you, not your toy, not your pet, not your product. In a relationship of respect, your task is to understand the other person as a unique individual and learn how to mesh your needs with his or hers and help that person achieve what he or she wants to achieve. Your task is not to control the other person or try to change him or her in a direction that you desire but he or she does not. I think this applies as much to parent-child relationships as to husband-wife relationships,” Peter Gray, research professor at Boston College, and author of Free to Learn and the textbook Psychology wrote in Psychology Today.
The world is divided when it comes to interfaith marriages. And it’s not just about marriage, the world is divided by religion. But if you cannot respect and tolerate differences, it is a toxic trait that you need to work on and not encourage. One may find a partner of the same faith but it’s not like they will agree with you on everything. How will you be tolerant of any differences? We already have enough violence and hatred being spread in the name of religion. And in times like these, this video just gave us what we needed. And hopefully, someday, weddings like these will be more common than they are right now.