Woman Shares How Not Taking Action Against Molester Led To Victim Guilt. That’s Social Conditioning Talking!
We're sorry this happened to her.
It is not beyond imagination what women who get molested or harassed go through. It is a traumatising experience which takes them a lot of time to overcome, and the process of moving on is not easy. A lot of times women get told that they should slap the man who inappropriately touches them or misbehaves with them or that the woman should go to the police to file a complaint. These bits of advice are helpful, yes, but what these people do not understand is that it is not as simple as it seems to just retaliate and slap the perpetrator. Sometimes the realisation that something of this sort is happening to a woman, freezes them. And later, it is the woman who ends up regretting not doing anything in that situation.
A Twitter user shared her story of how she was inappropriately touched by a man. She wrote that she yelled at him at that moment but when she came home she has this constant anxiety of not having done enough to teach that man a lesson. She further wrote that she is down with a high fever and has been crying while blaming herself for not taking serious action against the man.
A guy touched me inappropriately today while I was out & when it happened I just yelled at him & let him go but after coming back home, I have this constant anxiety, high fever & I am crying without any reason. I am also mad at myself for not slapping him or for not taking a…
— Komal Shahid (@ArmedWithWords) April 12, 2023
The Twitter user also went on to say that the first time the molester touched her, she brushed it away as a misunderstanding. But when it happened the second time, she yelled at him. She also wrote that she froze at that moment, and cannot describe the feeling that is bubbling inside ever since she came home. She further wrote that she is mad at herself for not doing anything.
It is quite natural for her to have gotten frozen at that moment because of the body’s fight and flight option, her body chose the latter. This is exactly what women feel when they are violated. That feeling of helplessness, and blaming herself for not being able to stand up for her well-being gnaws at her.
This also has to be contributed to the fact that women have been conditioned to remain silent when something of this sort happens. They are told to not report it and are gaslit into believing that if they do, they only will be shamed. So, shame, embarrassment, and shock render a woman helpless.
Also read: “Because They Were Rich People…”: Class 12 Girl Ends Life, Blames Police Failure To Arrest Her Molestors
My heart goes out to the Twitter user who shared this heartwrenching incident. Sending lots of healing and positive vibes your way, girl. Nothing that happened was your fault, and you did what you could.
First Published: April 13, 2023 4:05 PMDCW Chief Swati Maliwal Slams BJP Ministers Claiming Molestation Video Was ‘Fake Sting’
