5 Signs Your Relationship Lacks Emotional Intimacy
When we talk about intimacy, a lot of us simply think about the physical aspect of it. Sure, physical intimacy is more tangible and can, to an extent, be measured. But emotional intimacy is slightly more difficult to gauge. Often, we handle relationships in a superficial manner. We connect, but do we really? Can we sit silently next to each other and still feel like we’ve spoken? Can we look into each other’s eyes and immediately understand how the other person feels? I am not saying we have to be mind-readers. But emotional intimacy brings along this unusual connection that makes you feel like one. And a relationship that lacks emotional intimacy can make you feel empty inside. It’s lonelier in such a relationship than being single. Which is why, it’s important to communicate openly and discuss about the issues that plague your amorous affair. But not before you first identify the signs that will help you approach the matter and tell you what areas of your relationship need fixing. Fret not, here are 5 signs that show your relationship lacks emotional intimacy.
You feel disconnected
It’s not like you both are geographically away (or you could be). You meet, spend time together but there’s this strong disconnect you feel and you can’t pinpoint the reason behind it. I trust my gut instincts the most and whenever I haven’t, I have regretted that. So if it feels like you both are disconnected, you most probably are.
None of you talk about your emotions
You talk about a lot of things, but refrain from talking about your emotions. You both use ‘I think’ much more than ‘I feel’ and that’s not how emotional intimacy can be built. The question here is, why? We are conditioned to hide our feelings because society has deemed it to be a sign of weakness. Is it that or is it because your relationship doesn’t feel like a place safe enough for you to be vulnerable? Either ways, it’s time to address the elephant in the room.
There are secrets you don’t share
When you’re keeping things from each other, you basically have a glass wall up between the two of you. Sure, it’s not like you have to share every single detail about everything in your life. But hiding a major chunk from your partner will just create barriers that are difficult to break down, especially if they don’t know about it. It’s not always about the I love you’s, it’s about really sharing your lives with each other!
You don’t feel heard or understood
Emotional closeness can fly through the window when one or both partners don’t feel understood. What’s worse than not communicating enough? It’s speaking up and yet feel like your partner isn’t really listening.
There’s not enough eye contact
They say our eyes are the window to our souls. When we are really connected to someone, we make a lot of eye contact. In fact, sometimes, a look is all you need to communicate with each other. If you and your partner don’t indulge in this non-verbal communication, chances are you are not letting each other in.