Committing to your partner who you love can be an amazing feeling. With marriage, we all begin a new chapter of our lives with our partners. And we all love a good big fat Indian wedding. They’re the most beautiful celebrations of love and union. I’ve been there. I’ve gotten married to someone who I believed to be my “the one” only to be disappointed and forced to walk away. While I hold no regrets for listening to my heart, it has made me now want to stay away from marriage. I’m more open to live-in relationships as opposed to marriage. More so because I don’t see how those two are any different except for the legalities that go into marriage. IMHO, marriage has little to offer but I still have some unanswered questions about how marriage and live-in relationships are different from each other and it looks like there’s a Twitter user who also has similar questions. While scrolling through Twitter I landed upon this interesting tweet from a user posing a question to people about marriage and live-in.
In the tweet, the user asked people what marriage gives to people that a fully committed live-in relationship doesn’t and questioned why people want to get married. She further pointed out that she has been asking people this question and the only answer she has received from them is that it’s a duty that they have towards their parents or society. And the answers given by Twitterati are a reality check that we all need.
Listing the reasons to get married, several users pointed out that it has a variety of financial benefits with joint wealth and makes it easier to obtain loans and whatnot. Some users shares how marriage can give a couple a sense of security and legal rights as well as allow them to live together and start a family without any judgement from society. Users also shared that marriage makes it easier for couples to emotionally invest in each other without fearing that the other person will walk out on them. Apart from legal and financial protection, users also shared that it makes it easier for a couple to get a house on rent. But let’s be honest, these reasons aren’t enough to marry someone, are they?
Also Read: Live-In Relationships Are Legal. Our Society Needs To Stop Acting Like It’s A Crime
On the other hand, speaking of live-in relationships, users shared that while it does not offer anything apart from partnership and companionship, marriage is simply something people do to avoid judgement and having to answer questions posed by society. Many users pointed out that society has conditioned us and shaped our perspective that marriage is the only secure and socially acceptable form of companionship that is recognised by the law as well. There were users who shared that in today’s time, people don’t get married for companionship but rather for the “wedding” meaning that it’s something people have been doing for aesthetics as opposed to companionship.
Also Read: Allahabad High Court Says Anti-Dowry Law Misuse And Live-In Relationships Are Spoiling The Constitution Of Marriage
Well, that’s very reassuring (note the sarcasm). After scrolling through all the replies and quoted tweets, I’ve come to realise that we’ve been told to believe that marriage is important but in all honesty, we’re a generation of insecure people who have married or wish to marry more for legal and financial security and less for love. Because live-in may not be very acceptable to society but it has everything that marriage has sans the legalities. Speaking of India, our laws actually give a couple in a live-in relationship all the legal security that one has in a marriage including the legitimacy of a child and it comes with no strings. When I say no strings I mean that walking out of a live-in relationship does not involve the paperwork that marriage does and in some situations that can be a major relief. On the other hand, live-in is still something that is looked down upon and we desi people know that our brown parents would never agree to let us be in a live-in relationship and neither will society. Despite live-in being legal in India, finding a flat on rent for unmarried couples has been made an impossible task by society in a bid to prevent this “western” concept.
NGL but this conversation on Twitter is a much-needed reality check that we all need. Is it just a relationship of convenience to shut society up? Maybe it’s time we sit and rethink why marriage is so important for all of us.