Dating apps are fashioning the way we figure out romance in modern times. Love them or hate them, they exist and are probably of no good help. In a world where food can be ordered in a scroll, at the tip of the finger, love somewhat is getting a similar treatment. Unlike most, the pull-out game of female participants on such apps is better and quicker. It’s one day into signing up and the next morning of regret that fuels the exit. It is more about swimming in the sea of surface-level connections, with almost or no meaning attached to creating human bonds. As someone who aggressively loved the idea of love, romance served on dating apps is making my forever look very far away!
This ideology has also made the once-relevant presence of such apps, go missing. Hence, I decided to dissect the birth of dating apps that take the oath to pair you up with your “soulmate,” but end up squeezing your soul. Well, like most potential participants on such apps, I hopped from one person to the other, gathering evidence for my research and found this one Reddit user, who mentioned–”Dating apps are shit, they’re all optimised for squeezing money out of people instead of pairing people up.”
In contrast to the core purpose of a dating app, created to help build connections, today, such apps have drastically reduced our appetite for love. This results from the million options that these platforms lay down on a tray. What most also lack is the concept of accountability. Many women and also men have complained about getting ghosted out of the blue. Devika Raj Singh, 25 revealed–”On dating apps, guys show interest for 10 minutes and then ghost. It’s just a space to pass the time.” Many also use such apps as a coping mechanism to “move on” from their previous relationships, using potential future partners, as mere “rebounds.” Emotionally exhausting for most, dating apps are also extremely judgemental, swiping a person to the right or left, based on appearance. Well, this indirectly plays against a person’s self-esteem, especially women, who otherwise are judged for a million other things in the world.
Pragya Dubey, 26, who has had her share on such apps, stated–”Dating apps require a lot of effort and most conversations end abruptly. The feeling that there are many fishes in the sea is the biggest distraction on dating apps, and TBH, I lost the tiniest hope of finding a partner there. Most guys are not interested in even knowing your name!” Makes sense. Suhani Sharma, 27, shared an interesting perspective–”I’ve met some good people, who I ended up having professional bonds with and built a work-related connection, but never have I found a person with a mutual intent to date or even put the effort of knowing where it goes. Most men also don’t express their wish to be friends, if not something romantic.”
“People pretend a lot on dating apps. The kind of people I’ve met turn out to be very different IRL, as compared to their profiles,” mentioned Jasleen Kaur Gupta, 40. She added–”If you met someone through friends, workplace or even social media apps like Instagram, there is at least some sense of accountability. People don’t fake as much there, but on a dating app, it is like your animal instinct coming out.” Ms Gupta also shared a personal story and revealed–”When you reach your 40s, you hope at least now men in the similar age bracket would want something serious. But, nah, it is the same thing. I remember once a man who I matched with, on a dating app, had put up his 10-year-old picture, and IRL and the picture didn’t match at all. It was very scary and it gave me such trust issues that I forced him to show me his Adhaar card and I found out that he had even lied about his name. So, if something wrong happens, who do we blame then? I feel dating apps do not have any credibility.”
Adding to this, Akanksha Mehrotra, 32, shared her concerns with such apps–” I started using dating apps, a year and a half ago. I feel my days were wasted to find someone who is remotely as funny, smart, and of the age they mention on the app. There is zero credibility. All I know about them is like some 18-year-old kid whose got easy access to the internet, takes pictures using AI, fishes for women using the app and matches with them to fulfil some freaky fantasies. Finding love through dating apps is like sniffing garbage bags. It is about lowering your standards.
Charu Gupta, 27, who identifies as bisexual, revealed how different dating apps are for her–”If you enter dating apps looking for a same-sex relationship, the ALL section is mostly filled with men, who want to prove that you haven’t discovered the world of men, that’s why you think you’re a lesbian. I often purposefully match with them, questioning what they’re doing in this section and they say, “Try me first.” I have seen a lot of couples who are looking for a threesome, where women make fake profiles and when you match they reveal they’re a couple. Some women are experimenting and exploring their sexuality. I don’t think same-sex relationships start on dating apps and the number of legit profiles is very low.”
Also Read: Women On Reddit Share Biggest Lies They’ve Heard From Their Ex And We’re Speechless!
A Reddit user also dug out some interesting facts about such apps and mentioned–”I think it’s just a symptom of trying to date random people. I do think the apps have made this problem far worse for people because of the frequency at which you can now “meet” people, but I think it’s the same problem that has always existed.”
This new way of finding love is exhausting and almost kills our urge to fall for one. It’s like a black hole of frivolous interactions, and meaningless chats, perhaps the only black hole with a quick door to exit. You say, dating apps, I call it a lonely hearts club.
Also Read: Is Love Enough To Sustain Long-Term Relationship? Reddit Users Share Insightful Views!