What To Do When Someone Is Crying? Psychiatrist Shares Tips On How To Console Someone
We all experience our fair share of ups and downs and they come with a rollercoaster of emotions, one of which is crying. TBH, I’m not a big crier but I don’t judge or mind someone else crying in front of me. Having said that, let’s all just accept the fact that watching someone cry is not easy. And in most cases, the advice we give or the way we comfort someone who’s crying rises out of our own discomfort. Plus, we don’t really know what they’re feeling which makes it even more difficult to console them and say the right things. Don’t you just wish there was a guide to consoling someone who’s crying without making things worse? Well, that’s exactly what we have here. Consultant Psychiatrist Dr Rahul Khemani gave us a few tips on how to comfort someone and get their tears to stop flowing.
1. Word It Right
Pointing out that it’s hard to see someone cry and not know what to do, Dr Rahul Khemani shares that it’s completely normal for people to cry every now and then, sometimes because of a reason and sometimes without it. He suggests it’s best to console them by saying comforting things like ‘I’m sorry for your pain’ or ‘I know you’re going through a tough time’ or something as simple as ‘I’m here for you’.
2. Open Yourself To Them
When someone is crying in front of you, they’re being vulnerable and the best way to comfort them is to open yourself up to them. Dr Khemani shares that it’s a good idea to share your personal experiences with the person to help them understand that it’s normal to cry but make sure to never draw comparisons or turn the focus on yourself, let it be about them.
3. Opened Ended Questions Help
According to Dr Rahul Khemani, there’s nothing wrong with asking open-ended questions like ‘what triggered you’ or ‘do you want to talk about it’. “Even if you ask them what happened, make sure that you don’t push them to talk about it”, adds the psychiatrist.
4. Do Not Cut Them Off
While it’s good to off emotional comfort and ask questions to someone when they’re crying, Dr Rahul Khemani says, “Make sure that you don’t cut them off when they’re talking and don’t minimize their feelings. Allow them to express or vent out their emotions and feelings freely.”
5. Hugs Can Do Wonders
Hold on, before you rush to comfort someone who’s crying with a hug, make sure that it’s not inappropriate or uncomfortable for them. Stressing the importance of physical touch, Dr Khemani says that if it is appropriate then give the person a hug or just pat their back or shoulder slowly. “Physical touch often helps comfort a person,” he adds.
6. Don’t Try Too Hard
Dr Rahul Khemani shares that it is important to understand that you cannot always do something to turn the situation around and sometimes just your presence is what matters. He further added, “Don’t try too hard to help the person, just go with the flow and let the situation unfold on its own.”
Also Read: How To Recognize Early Signs Of Mental Health Problems? 6 Mental Health Red Flags To Look Out For
View this post on Instagram
TBH, I think it’s important to understand that if someone is opening up to you, you don’t always have to comfort them. Understand that this is their safe space for a reason.
